Late
by asveff
Summary: Life can play us sometimes. Just when you think everything is under control something happens that turns your life in 180 degrees. Sensitive content, read under your own risk.
1. Encounter

Several of the characters belong to **E. L. James**

 **This chapter was EDITED**

* * *

Ana and Christian met ten years ago. It was what is commonly called a summer love. She was 18, he was 21. They lived in different cities. It was just chance, or fate -if you believe in that sort of things- that placed them together back then in the same resort in Miami. He was on vacation with his brother, Elliot, and Ana was working at a hotel trying to save some money for college.

They weren't looking for a relationship, but the chemistry between them was palpable. It just happened. And when things were about to get serious, their time was over. Ana went to California where she was going to start her college education and Christian went back to Seattle, he was running a very successful business.

* * *

Christian is walking around the mall, he's carrying his six-month-old daughter. His wife of almost two years follows him looking at the showcases. They are searching for a present for Grace, Christian's mother. Jessica is talking about the baby's next doctor's appointment when he sees her.

She is in a furniture store looking at a desktop, she passes her finger gently over the wood of a nice wooden vintage desk. Ana, his first love. They never actually said the L word to each other, but he was not going to lie to himself, not after 10 years of thinking about her.

'I'm not sure furniture is the right option for Grace.' Jessica's words brought him back to the here and now.

'No... no' he answered distracted, seeing the shining ring on Ana's finger. 'I thought I saw... never mind'. He cleared his head and kept walking, holding his baby, remembering himself why he still was with his wife.

He was celebrating a one year relationship with her when he proposed. Almost 30 and single. He took what he thought was a good advice. A few months later in the marriage he realized he made a huge mistake. Jessica was not a bad person, at all. But he wasn't in love with her.

He tried everything he could to make his marriage work anyway, he was not a quitter, at least not without trying. They had good and bad days, but no matter what, he just didn't feel love for her. So he decided to finally end it and ask for a divorce.

But then, one day his wife got pregnant

and everything changed. It was not about how he felt anymore.

* * *

Ana is browsing around, not paying much attention. Her mind wanders about being in Seattle, so close to who could have been the love of her life, the thought made her feel unsettled.

Shaking her head in disapproval, she tried to focus on her task. She picked a desktop, she could see herself writing comfortable on it. They needed pretty much everything. John and her were just moving to their new apartment in downtown.

The Newlyweds were excited about starting their marriage life in a new city. Ana was distracted when John came to her passing his arm around her waist.

'This is the one?' John asked smiling to her in sign of approval, he knew how serious Ana was about the right desk to write on.

'Yes' she answered less enthusiastic, she was not feeling as excited as him.

'Are you okay, honey?' Asked the concerned husband.

'Yes..., I'm just a bit tired' she gave him a small smile.

'I know, hopefully today we'll get the shipping of our brand new bed. We should have slept at a hotel instead.' He said giving her a tender kiss on the lips. 'Let's get some lunch to get energy, let's go.' They paid for the furniture and left the store.

They were about to order when it happened. Ana was looking at a shoe store on the distance, thinking on taking a look there after lunch when she saw him.

Christian was carrying his baby, looking at the shoes, tenderly kissing the little girl's head...

'I'm not hungry anymore.' Ana said abruptly. John looked at her concerned and embarrassed.

'Oh...' replied John looking at the waitress with an apologetic smile.

'Can we order take out?' Replied Ana, trying to repair her rudeness.

'Of course, not problem' answered the server.

Ana stand up. 'You can order for me, I'll be waiting in the car.'

She didn't give him any time to reply, he was left just sitting there looking at his wife walking away.

Ana was passing by, store after store, only seeing blurry images, her eyes were humid, she was feeling big tears coming, she couldn't allow herself to cry.

It was not okay, she was a married woman, she couldn't have feelings for another man. Not after ten years. But very inside of her she knew she only got married to John because she was scared of ending up alone. And she felt worse, she rushed into a decision for the wrong reasons.

She married John two months ago, he got promoted and they had to move to Seattle. Ana's first thought when she got the news was Christian. Now standing leaning her back on the car she felt bad, even dirty, John didn't deserve to be with someone like her.

John walks to Ana carrying the bags with the food. He sees her leaning on the car, the change hasn't been easy, he could understand that. And the fact that they were sleeping very uncomfortably in sleeping bags for the last two days didn't make it any easier.

'Are you okay?' He asked when he reached her. 'You seem concerned'

Ana that has been trying to calm herself gave the only answer she could think of.

'Yes, I just have a head ache. I think I need to rest a little bit. Didn't sleep that well last night.' That was only half a lie.

'Do you want me to go and buy something for the pain?'

Jesus, she thought, why does he has to be so comprehensive?. Instead she said. 'No, I just need a nap John, but thank you.'

They got into the card and drove home. Ana was not used to the very fancy place they were living now. A building called Escala. As soon as they arrived to the empty place Ana lay down on the sleeping bag and with a very disturbed mind she felt asleep.

Ana dreamt of sand and sun, she was in her happy place, she was with him, her love. She felt so good, so happy. Everything felt so right...

'Ana, wake up' said john softly. 'The bed is finally here!' He said grinning.

Ana, disoriented for a few seconds came back to reality.

'Get up, baby. Let's go down to sign' John was so excited that Ana couldn't say no.

* * *

Christian and Jessica were arriving at Escala. They finally found a gift for Grace, after a long search and unnecessary shopping from his wife.

Taylor, their driver and security man was opening the door for her when Christian got a call from Ros.

'Hello Ros, yes. Okay, sure. Oh right now? It's fine, I'm on my way.'

'I gotta go to the lobby, I'll meet you upstairs.' Said Christian to Jessica getting out of the car and walking out of the parking to the lobby of the building.

A few urgent paperwork needed his signature. He walked to the reception table where a young man was waiting for him with an envelope.

'Mr. Grey' said the young mailman.

'How's it going?' said Christian not giving him much attention, taking the papers out and searching for his pen inside his jacket pocket. While signing, a delivery truck was downloading a king size bed. Grey gave the boy the papers and with a handshake as goodbye walked away to the elevators.

He pressed the arrow up, he didn't even wait two second when the door opened to give access out to two people inside. It was Ana, holding the hand of a blonde guy.

They were both perplex by a second that just they seemed to notice.

'Good afternoon' said John cordially, oblivious to the little tense moment. 'John Colt' he introduced himself offering his hand.

'Christian…' said him a bit out of place. 'Christian Grey' he added recovering his confidence.

'The famous Seattle businessman' said John smiling. 'You looked familiar Mr. Grey, my wife and I just moved to this building, by the way, she is my wife, Anastasia Colt.'

Christian looked at Ana fully in the eyes, eyes that he knew. 'Nice to meet you, Mrs. Colt' he answered with more resentment than he pretended to.

'Mr Grey, the pleasure is mine' she answered with a knot on her throat and feeling her face blushing.

'It has been a pleasure Mr. Grey, if you excuse us we have to receive a parcel, I hope we see you around' said Colt.

'I don't spend much time in the building' he answered coldly. Realizing of his lack of cordiality seeing that the smile on Colt's face was changing to an uncomfortable look, he added. 'But yes, I hope I see you soon too' and without giving another look he got into the elevator, wrote the code to his penthouse and the door started to close, he could see Ana turning her head to look at him, and their eyes connected once more, she had an expression of anguish that imitated his. The doors closed.


	2. Not Him - Not Her

Several of the characters belong to **E. L. James**

 **This chapter was EDITED**

* * *

Ana followed John by inertia. She couldn't believe what was happening. Yes, she was aware of Christian's success. Yes, perhaps meeting him by chance was a possibility -which happened earlier that day-. But never, ever, not even in her dreams or nightmares she could have thought about living in the same building.

"Look honey, that's a big bed, we are going to sleep comfortably today, though I don't know if we'll be sleeping." John said the last words in her ear. Ana tried to smile at such insinuation, however, the recent event left her with her mind somewhere else.

"John, I think my headache is coming back, do you mind if I go up?"

"Of course not, you'll be able to sleep better now. We'll leave everything ready right away." John answered smiling, so far he didn't have any reasons to not being happy. He just got married to a wonderful woman, was promoted at his job and he bought a new apartment to start his wed life. It was much more than what he could ask for. He kissed Ana on the lips and went to talk to the delivery guys. He was so proud of himself that he didn't notice Ana's unhappiness and coldness towards him.

* * *

Christian was breathing uneasily while the elevator was going up. Anastasia Colt, it doesn't even sound nice, he was thinking while passing from side to side in the small space he had.

Stop, he ordered himself, it has been ten years, I'm married, she is married.

He leaned on a wall of the elevator and closed his eyes, but all he could see was Ana ten years ago, laughing because of something funny he just had said.

The doors opened to the foyer of his penthouse. He opened his eyes, took a deep breath and walked inside the apartment,. He didn't see any sign of Jessica so he walked fast to his office and locked the door. He sat in his very comfortable and very business man black leather chair.

Why was this happening to him? He felt so tempted to talk to her, he needed to talk to her.

He called her, several times. She never answered. She avoided him after the best summer of his life. He felt stupid, how come he felt so connected to her and she was so cold towards the hole situation. He gave up after a few months, but he could never take her out of his head. Maybe, he thought, I should have done more to reach her...

Reaching for the intercom he called Taylor.

'What can I help you, sir?'

'It seems we have new neighbors, Taylor?'

'That's right, Mr. Grey. Mr Colt and his wife moved two days ago to the 18th floor.'

'I need you to do something for me...'

* * *

Ana locked herself in the bathroom, washed her face with cold water and looked at her reflections in the mirror for what could have been hours. Somehow it felt as she aged in less than 24 hours, she looked tired and concerned and sad, so sad...

Since she was already there decided to take a bath to relax. Flashes of her summer with Christian came to her mind.

She loved him, she felt in love with him. But she was young and so different to him. She felt like she didn't belong to his world. He was a rich man, smart and attractive, he obviously was not looking to have a serious relationship with her, barely a college girl with just a few hundred dollars on her bank account.

With all the strength she could she never answered a called from him, she didn't want to get hurt and she focused on her studies, but never could stop thinking about him. She felt, very inside of her that she made a mistake not answering his calls and it hurt, may be even more than what a broken heart would.

'Ana, you've been in the bathroom for like two hours, the bed is ready if you want to lay down.'

'Thanks John, I'm coming out.'

Slowly she got off the bathtub and started to dry her body, not looking at the mirror this time. She got dress with the bathrobe and went out to her bedroom, she sincerely smiled when she saw the welcoming bed. She run to it and lay down over the covers.

John got into the bedroom carrying a tray with food. 'Please, eat some food, you had nothing for lunch, I ordered the salmon, I know you love it' he said tenderly looking at his wife. Ana started eating her food, but feeling her stomach empty anyway. John could be perfect, but he was not her Christian.

* * *

Christian walked out of his office, he was not sure what he was doing, but he didn't feel guilty, he was feeling excitement for the first time in a very long time, and a smile run through his face.

He went to his baby's nursery. She was already sleeping, hopefully for the hole night. He lend to kiss her goodnight. Violet was the reason of his happiness. What kept him going, the reason why he never got the chance to ask for a divorce.

Jessica walked into the room and leaned her head in his chest, trying to be tender. Christian hugged her for a second and let go. She was used to his coolness and didn't care, he was pretty much always cold towards her. It has been almost a year since nothing has happened between them.

'Dinner is ready, Gale and Taylor are joining us' she said to break the silence.

'Actually, I'm not feeling very well, please apologize for me, enjoy dinner. I'll have an early night.'

He walked to his room, realizing how little Jessica was like Ana, and how perfect Ana was for him.


	3. It's Late

Several of the characters belong to **E. L. James**

 **This chapter was EDITED**

* * *

 _They walk holding hands by the seashore. The water touches their feet sometimes, it's warm, they are waiting for the sunset._

 _They are talking about everything and anything, absorbing every single detail of information they can get from each other. The talking gets interrupted sometimes by comfortable silences enjoying the view and each other's company._

 _The sound of the sea fulfills the empty spaces._

 _'We have been going out for a month and I have never given you flowers,' said Christian breaking a moment of silence. It was not a question, just commenting a thought, it was hard not sharing everything that went through his mind with her._

 _'It's not like I'm waiting for you to give me flowers,' she replied._

 _'What kind of flowers do you like?' Now he was curious to know._

 _'Violets.'_

 _'Violets? I thought all women liked roses.'_

 _'I like those too, but violets are my favourites' she said smiling._

 _"Why?"_

 _'Well, it's all about the meaning. To start, the color symbolizes creativity and imagination. They also have a more mystical story. According to Romans the flower was a metaphoric bridge between fantastic worlds and reality, they believed that these flowers were gods' tears of emotion when they contemplated their creation. Besides is the color of those who seek for a deeper meaning in life.'_

 _Christian was looking at her amazed and with interest, he admired her intelligence, she knew a lot of everything to be so young, maybe it was the result of reading so much, there was a reason she was going to study literature and creative writing once vacations were over._

 _The sun was starting to set, they sat on the dry sand to look at it, she leaned her head on his shoulder._

 _'It's beautiful' said Ana looking at the horizon getting orange._

 _'It is indeed' he said looking at her. The name Violet was echoing in his head, maybe if he ever had a daughter one day, he'll name her like that._

Ana woke up from a deep dream, on her face there was a beautiful and wide smile. In the deepens of her subconscious she went back to her happy place, more than a dream it was a memory, in her mind every second of that sunset remained with clarity.

Her smile got smaller when she turned and saw John still sleeping on the other side of the bed. After dinner last night she had to fake one more time her headache so her husband won't insist on the 'opening' of the new bed.

Oh God, what am I gonna do now? She thought. Seeing Christian, made her realize that she never loved John. On the other hand she couldn't hurt him, he was such a good man.

A different thought crossed her mind then, she having all these feelings for Christian didn't mean anything if he was married as well. He is with someone else. He has a daughter. The fact of seeing him couldn't ruin her life with John.

Yes, it is true. I'm not in love with him, but I could, she thought. I have to work on my marriage. I can't give up so easily on this because... because... and she couldn't bear the thought... because Christian was in love with his wife...

She felt tears coming. No. I'm not going to waste tears. I have to grow up. Her mind was a mess again, forgotten was her beautiful dream, she finally got up.

Half an hour later John approached her hugging her from the back, and giving her a kiss on the neck. Ana had breakfast ready. Just toasts and coffee, they needed to do some grocery shopping.

'Good morning, sweetie' said John sitting on the kitchen island and starting to eat. 'Feeling better?'

'Yes, I needed a good sleep in a bed' she said smiling the best she could.

'Happy to hear'

When dishes where clean and John was fixing his tie, ready to leave for work a bell coming from the elevator foyer interrupted their morning.

Ana walked to the foyer where a delivery man was waiting.

'Delivery for Mr. and Mrs. Colt' said the man. 'Just sign here'

Ana signed and the guy gave her a beautiful bouquet of Violets with a bottle of wine. She knew who was it from. Expecting to be wrong she walked inside holding both presents.

'What is it?' Ask John now ready and carrying his briefcase. 'Oh...?' He said seeing Ana with both hands full. 'Who's that from?' He asked again reaching for the bottle of what seamed to be a very expensive red wine.

'There's a card here' replied Ana. On the bouquet there was a small white envelope, John took it and read.

 ***To Mr. and Mrs. Colt. Welcome to the building. From Christian and Jessica Grey***

'Wow, that's nice. For a moment I thought he didn't like me.' I guess I was wrong.

'Why would you say that?' asked Ana walking to the kitchen and looking for something to put the flowers on water.

'I don't know, he was a bit weird yesterday, don't you think? Anyway I gotta go, honey. See you for dinner' he gave her a kiss on the lips and walked to the elevator.

* * *

Christian was having breakfast, constantly looking at his watch. Waiting for Taylor's message. Jessica was breastfeeding Violet. He knew that soon Colt was leaving for work and Ana will be alone. Getting all the information he wanted was one of the perks of being rich and powerful.

He felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. Reaching discretely for it he read: ***package delivered***

'Work?' Asked his wife.

'No..., I mean yes. It's just this early meeting I have. I'll have to leave soon.' He said trying to act normal, he was getting nervous. Things could go very wrong. After all, he didn't know anything about Ana's situation.

'We are hosting this play date with some kids from your company employees, mommies and daddies are coming. It's gonna be fun. Are you going to be here?' Jessica usually tried to include him in her very active social life, that if possible increased with the birth of Violet.

'That's going to be here?' He asked a bit upset. She nodded. 'I don't have any choice to skip it then' he replied sighting.

He liked playing with his daughter, being part of her life and seeing her getting bigger, smarter and beautiful, but the idea of sharing time with a bunch of people he barely said hi at work was no appealing at all.

He still had his phone on his hand. When the screen lightened up he looked at it right away. *Colt's out*.

'I got to go' he said standing up and kissing his baby's head. ' His heart was beating fast.

* * *

Ana was gently caressing the flowers, he still remembers my favorite flower. But that doesn't need to mean anything. The bell coming from the elevator rang again. She went to the foyer.

She got there right on time to see the door opening. Christian got out of it. He gave a step in to the apartment. They were face to face. Looking into each other's eyes.

'Hello, Anastasia' he said. Hearing her name on his lips made her shivered.

'Hi' she said almost whispering, not able to keep looking at Christian's face. 'Do you want to come in?' She said turning and walking to the kitchen, Christian followed.

'Thank you for the flowers.' She said pointing to them. 'The kitchen is the only place where we have chairs for the moment. Do you want something?' She said starting the kettle, just to do something. Christian sat in one the chairs.

'I don't. I…' he was there for a reason, of course. But seeing Ana so close made it for him to focus. He didn't want to scare her and lose her again. 'I… Ana, are you happy?'

She didn't see that coming at all. How was she supposed to tell him the truth. No, I'm not, because I still love you. She couldn't.

'I..., I am, why wouldn't I be?' She said not making eye contact.

'Don't lie to me please.' That was not the answer he wanted to hear, he could feel she was not being honest, he was good reading people and she knew it.

'Christian…, why would I…' she couldn't lie to him again. 'What about you?'

He run his fingers through his hair and search for her eyes, thinking for a second. 'I'm not, I don't think I've ever been as happy as I was when we were together.' Saying that out loud felt so good for him. But Ana didn't know what to say. They were married, the image of her running to his arms was wrong.

'I know is horrible, Ana.' Christian said reading her expression. 'I just can't help it anymore. Not now that we are so close to each other again. I dream about this for so long. I know you didn't feel the same way Ana, I understand that, we were way too young. But I loved you… and I still do.'

For so many years she dream about those words, but she felt so guilty. It was late now.

'I did feel the same way, Christian.'

'You… you did?' he felt hope for the first time in years. 'I called you so many times. I never wanted us to end.'

'Christian we were so different. I didn't know you loved me. What if you were just playing around'

Christian stand up from his seat not believing her words. 'How could you possible have thought that. I know it sounds cheesy, but after the perfect time we had together… did I ever gave you the impression of being playing with you?' He said all that raising his voice. He gave a step towards Ana. Standing on the other side of the kitchend island.

Ana didn't know what to say. It was true. Her stupidity was the reason things were the way they are. A silent tear run down through her cheek.

'I'm not happy, Christian… but it doesn't matter. We are married and you have a daughter, we are not 18 or 21 anymore.' And taking a deep breath she said something that was hurtful for both of them. 'It's late for us. You need to leave.'


	4. News - Not A Chapter

Hello everyone

I have some things to say…

I apologize for not posting in so long and leaving my stories uncompleted but quite a few things have happened.

About a year ago I moved to Canada and I didn't bring a laptop with me, so I didn't have a computer to write on. When I finally got one I didn't have much time to write. I was working a lot and sightseeing around the place I live now, I live in a very crazy town haha.

Anyways, when I finally got the inspiration and time to write I started a few stories, which I was very excited about. But then I had a problem with my brand new computer that I bought for two main reasons: editing pictures of my adventure and writing. I was not happy.

3 months took to the company to fix it. On the meantime I tried to write on my cellphone, and I did, but it's just not the same. I got my computer back, I started to edit the chapters I had on my phone along with some things I needed to do, because I'm moving soon to another country hopefully, and my computer died again. #$%#%$% those are the words in my head when it happened.

Lucky me, this time took them only a week and I'm back!

So while writing on my phone I did some changes on the original story and I'll be posting the edited chapters first, so go back and read again please. I'll be updating soon, don't worry…

Thanks for reading me!


	5. Distracted

Several of the characters belong to **E L James**

* * *

Christian heard the words coming from her lips, but he couldn't understand them.

'Ana, don't say that. Please…, don't.'

'It's the true.' She replied, her voice was shaking. 'Christian, you have to leave now,' she asked.

He walked the distance between them. Ana had tears in her eyes. He tried to reach her face with his hand but she gave a step back.

Ana knew, if she allowed him to touch her she would lose all control of herself. 'No, Christian.' she said trying to sound confident.

He gave the step forward towards her again trying to touch her, trying to make some sense on her. 'Stop!' she said loud and clear. 'Christian, you have to leave now!' _I'm doing the right thing,_ she kept saying to herself, _I'm doing the right thing._

He clenched his teeth in despair and run his fingers through his hair… he felt so mad, so helpless, impotent. He shaked his head from one side to the other. His hopes were too high, he scared her, this was not working as planned, he ruined it by being so straightforward, what was he thinking.

''This is not the end. Not again.' He said as a promise and left from the same way he entered leaving Ana destroyed on the inside. She did what was right, not what she wanted to do.

He went down the elevator, and rushed into his car, he gave several punches to the driving wheel and when he felt finally tired and his nods started to hurt he rested his head on it. He felt stupid. He will have to be smarter than this.

 ***T. Get me Mrs Colt's cell phone. Thanks***

He started his car and drove to work. Why was he so mad? He couldn't really say. All he knew is that he was in love with Ana and she was in love with him. He knew, he always knew somehow that he should have tried harder when he could.

He got to work. Not looking at anyone he rushed to his office on the last floor of the building. He sat on his chair, he could only think of Ana saying it's late. _It's not late_ he replied to the voice on his head. _It can't be._

His phone rang.

'Good morning Mr. Grey. Mrs Bailey is on the phone. Sorry to interrupt you but she insisted.'

'It's all right. I'll answer her.'

'What?!' he said through the phone.

'Uh, what is it with the mood? We're actually waiting for you Grey, we have a presentation for you.' She said annoyed. She was used to Christian's mood, she was one of his few good friends and she knew about his marital problems.

'Fuck, I'll be there in ten minutes.'

'Five' she replied.

'It better be quick Ros.'

'Come on don't be an ass. See you in four, and later we can go for a coffee.'

'Whatever', he said annoyed.

Three minutes later he was leaving his office and was walking to the meeting room. Around fifteen people were there expectant for his presence. Some of them were looking uncomfortable when they saw his dog face.

'Morning' he said softening his voice a bit. He was after all always professional at work. His bad mood will have to wait.

The presentation started, he tried to focus. While in the middle of the presentation Taylor finally gave him an answer.

 ***Mrs Colt's phone number attached.***

His mood went up a little bit.

He open the attachment and add the number to his phone, not paying attention to the presentation he wrote:

 ***Hi. I'm sorry for today. I never meant to upset you,**...

'Mr Grey, is there something wrong?' Christian looked up, he was caught distracted. He didn't realize he was shaking his head from side to side while writing the message. Everybody was looking at him. Ros was killing him with her eyes.

'Let's take 10 minutes' she said. 'Please Christian, let's go to my office', and with that she walked away, he followed.

She closed the door after him and confronted him.

'What's the matter with you today, Grey? You're usually so well behave.'

'Ros, it's just... I have lots of things on my mind' he said

'Are you guys having trouble again…?'

'No, well..., nothing new in fact. Ros I think I'm ready now.'

'What do you mean? Like ready, ready?'

'I'll ask her for a divorce, I just can't keep lying to myself.'

'What happened? Few days ago you were saying you couldn't do that to Violet.'

'I know. Ros, can I trust you?'

'You know you can,' she said rolling her eyes.

'It's Ana' he said. He knew she knew what that name meant to him. She just listened, it was not the first time Christian started a conversation with her name.

'She is here, in Seattle, and she is married.' He said clenching his teeth and tightening his fists. He kept talking. 'She doesn't want to see me right now, I think I scared her, and…, and she said it's late for us. I can't accept that Ros, I can't bear this again.'

'Why do you say you scared her?'

'I had the words in my mind, I wanted to know how she was. That's it. But I saw her, I could feel it Ros, she is not happy so I asked her and I told her I love her… I screwed it up… I have to fix this, I can't lose her again.'

'Christian, do you even know what you are saying? She is married, you haven't know anything from her in ten years, you are in love with the memory of her not with the real Ana from now. You have to calm down, think things through and stop acting childish. That in there' she said pointing on the direction of the meeting room, 'was very unprofessional. Those people prepared this for you during several weeks, they don't deserve this. Please focus on what is real.'

She was right, what was he doing acting like that? At least not at work, he calmed himself down one more time.

'You're right. Sorry. Let's get over with this then.' They went back to the room. This time, at least on the surface, Christian acted as the CEO he was.

After the very long meeting, Christian was finally free to feel miserable again.

'Do you want to go for a drink, we can call Elliot. Does he know?' Ros offered, after all Christian tried the best he could and the meeting had good results in the end.

'I think I'll pass, I don't feel like it. Besides, Jessica organized this play date at home with a bunch of kids.' He couldn't avoid the displeased face.

'Actually, Gwen and I are going with Angela. I totally forgot about it. I guess I'll see you in a couple of hours any way.'

'I guess so' he said a little more enthusiastic since his friend was going to be there, and he kept walking to the elevator, nothing else needed his attention at the office so he decided to leave a bit earlier.

He sat on his car and checked his phone. Jessica had sent him a few pictures of Violet doing funny faces, that made his heart melt and also feel guilty. He never wanted to have a daughter and be away from her…, but circumstances can change.

He had another message from Elliot. Another from his mom… sister and so on. He didn't open any of them. What he did was search for the only person he could think of. He read the uncompleted message he left that morning.

 ***Hi. I'm sorry for today. I never meant to upset you,**

He deleted that message.

 ***Hello Anastasia. This is Christian. I took the liberty of asking for your number. I just want to apologize. Are you busy? Can I call you?***

He took a few seconds to press send. He was scared of not getting any answer, but he was wrong…

Ana distracted herself the best she could. She had a deadline for an article that was going to be published in a local newspaper back home and also the delivery of their new furniture was there so she was moving and placing items everywhere giving more life to the empty apartment. Even so she didn't succeed as much as she would have liked to. He said he loved her, that he was still in love with her. And she knew she never stopped loving him. But she was doing the right thing.

The day went by. John called to say he was going to be late for dinner. He was getting into a long meeting. Ana was grateful. She didn't want to see him, even though she didn't do anything wrong, the way she was feeling about Christian made her feel bad anyway. And she felt even worse when the thought of seeing him again made her feel happy, even though she told him to leave, she needed to see him or hear him.

Sitting on her brand new desk with half of her article done she was distracted by her phone. An unknown number sent her a text. Her heart skip a beat when she read it. And not being able to resist it, she called him, right away.

She heard a sight and then his voice.

'Anastasia' she could tell he was smiling.

'Hello Christian' she said also smiling, the moment of tension was long gone by now.

'Ana, I'm sorry about this morning. I don't know what I was thinking…'

'It's all good.' She cut him, she could understand why he acted like that, she felt the same way after all. There was a long silence. They could hear each other breathing through the phone.

'Please, don't be mad, but I meant what I said…'

'Christian, what's the point? Don't torture me with this.'

'No, I don't want to do that, of course not. I just want to make you happy Ana.'

Her subconscious was enjoying his words, but she needed to set limits.

'You said you were unhappy earlier. And I can't bear that, I can make you so happy, we have been happy together…' I know she thought, but didn't say it.

'Please, Christian. Don't do this again. What are we supposed to do?

'Ana, I made a mistake getting married, I just haven't had the guts to ask for a divorce, but I'll do it, I swear I'll do it. I don't love Jessica, I never did.'

'What do you want from me? I can't do that to John. He is a good man, he loves me. I'm sorry, but I also meant what I said. It's la…'

'No! Don't say it again' this time he interrupted her, he was raising his voice and for some reason that made Ana want him more. 'Don't you dare say it's late, because it's not. It's not!' he was holding the wheel hardly while saying it.

'Christian, it's just... I'm scared, what if this feelings are happening only because we have seen each other after so long. What if you don't like who I am now or I don't like you. '

'That's easy to fix,' he said, 'we can get to meet each other again.'


	6. Secret

Several of the characters belong to **E L James**

* * *

Christian was all smiles during the play date being held at his house. After talking to Ana he felt more confident and hopeful. The fact that they were going to at least try to know each other again was enough for him.

Ros noticed this, since his mood was so different than that morning. Christian didn't even seem annoyed by the amount of people with their children in his house. Only a couple of hours made such a great difference in his friend. And she could guess the reason why.

Gwen, her wife, was playing with Angela, their two year old daughter. Christian was laughing at something she had said while they were throwing the ball to each other. He was carrying Violet. Ros saw Jessica coming and trying to hug Christian from behind, but discreetly he rejected her. It was so obvious that Christian didn't love her. She always wondered about why she had never say something to Christian. It was impossible she didn't know he didn't love her.

Avoiding his wife Christian walked towards Ros.

'You seem very happy. Very different than earlier,' she said quietly so only he could hear.

'You think? I'm just having fun' he said with a wide smile that said it wasn't because of that. It couldn't be.

'At least tell me you can't say, but don't lie to me.'

'Well then, I can't say.' He left her and took Violet to the reading section, he took a book and tried to show it to his daughter. The evening finished without any other clue besides him in a very good mood.

After putting Violet to bed that night he said goodnight to Jessica and he excused himself for dinner again.

* * *

John left earlier than usual, he had been working a lot lately which was perfect for Ana because after arriving from work and eating her husband only wanted to sleep.

After John left that Friday morning she started her recent routine. Getting ready and preparing breakfast for two. An hour later the bell on the foyer announced her guest was there.

'Come to the kitchen' she yelled, she was pouring hot water on two tea cups.

'Good morning beautiful' he said smiling and approaching to the kitchen counter.

'No flirting, Christian', she said trying to sound serious, but also with a wide smile. She was loving this idea.

They have been doing this for the past two weeks, and they weren't fooling anybody. The connection, the chemistry, the sparks, everything was still there.

'Help me taking this to the living room, please' she said giving him the cups.

'So does your husband', he said the last with some resentment, 'work this weekend? Because I'll miss having breakfast with you.' Said Christian walking to the living room area and placing the cups on the coasters that Ana left there earlier.

'He doesn't, and don't over react. Besides… you might have some interesting news when you get home…'

Christian was loving the way Ana was taking everything now. They were being playful and were talking like they used to do. They had rules though. Not touching, no gifts, not flirting, just two acquaintances having breakfast every morning catching up with their lives and also they boh agree to keep it a secret.

'What is going on?' He asked intrigued.

'You'll see.' She said not giving him any clue.

'Do you want to see something funny?' He said while sitting on the couch just a few inches away from Ana, since she was not going to say anything about the "news".

'Always' she replied. Christian laughed.

'You are so funny' he said captivated by her quick answer. Their eyes connected and electricity passed between them… He could only think on kissing her, but Ana took control of the situation and broke the eye contact.

'So what were you going to show me?, she said with a weak voice and looking to her cup of tea. Breaking the moment.

Christian cleared his throat. It sounded a bit hoarse when he spoke again.

'Oh so, yeah look… I have this video…'

* * *

Christian got home after a long day at work. He was not in the best mood. He was not going to see Ana during the weekend, and he was getting used to the fact of seeing her everyday.

He took his jacket off at the foyer. Jessica was walking towards him holding an envelope.

'Hello honey', she said.

'Hi' he said coldly as he usually was towards her.

'Look what we got.' She continued giving him the already opened envelope.

He tried not to smile too wide when he saw the familiar handwriting.

 _Dear Mr and Mrs Grey,_

 _As a way of thanking you for your warm welcoming to the building we would like to have the pleasure of inviting you to dinner the upcoming Saturday at 6 pm at our place..._

Christian read the note. 'So what do you think, do you want to go?'

'Sure', said Jessica. 'I haven't had the chance to meet them yet and I'd love to.'

'Ok then', he said, I'll tell Taylor to send them a confirmation'. Christian walked to Taylor's office removing his tie and unbuttoning the top buttons of his shirt getting comfortable now that he was happier.

'Hi T' he said in a very happy mood now.

'Sir' he said.

'Can you send a replied to the Colts please. We'll be there tomorrow at 6.'

He nodded. As always he did as he was told. Though these past weeks was harder than ever.

'Say it, Taylor. I'll give you the answers you need' said Christian closing the door. 'I trust you and I know you mean well.'

Taylor was a tough guy, and also very correct. Christian could tell he was torn between his job and the loyalty to Jessica.

'Sir, anybody who has been in the same room with you and your wife can tell you don't love her, it's very obvious, sir. I can understand that, but you know I'm fond of the Mrs and I don't want her to get hurt. I'm not saying I'll be betraying you by saying something about your meetings with Mrs Colt, but I don't know if I can keep working for you under those circumstances.'

'I see…' Christian thought for a few seconds. 'I understand. I didn't know it was so obvious… the fact that I don't love my wife… Anyway, I know you are smart and I need you, I don't want you to quit and for your peace of mind I want you to know that I'm not doing anything wrong.'

Taylor didn't seem very convinced but his job was not to judge. Once again, Christian was good at reading people.

'You know what T? We need to have a talk. let's go have a drink, I'll explain everything you need to know.'

They went to one of the several restaurants Christian owned. After some food and eating Taylor understood everything that had been going on for the past two weeks, and he was sorry for Christian, as a man and as a father he knew how hard was to be in a marriage without love and staying there for her daughter.

'I understand now Mr Grey. I'm sorry if I judged you. As I say, Mrs Grey is not going to hear any of this from me. But... I know you haven't asked but may I give you a piece of advice?'

'Thank you Jason, of course you can.'

'Get a divorce sir, I'm pretty sure even though your wife won't be so happy, it will work out better for both of you. May be she will get the chance of finding someone who really loves her.'

'I know. I will.'

'And sir…'

'Yeah.'

'Don't you think it's really weird to go to that dinner.'

Christian sigh, 'I do, It was my first thought, but I feel is something I have to do.'

'What do you mean?'

'Ana keep saying how good of a man John is, she always speaks very good of him. If she isn't happy with him is because, well, she made the same mistake I did. And I can't stop thinking on the worst case scenario. What if in the end she choose him, what if he manage to make her love him more than she has ever loved me. I gotta see him with her, I gotta make sure if she makes that decision she'll be in good hands, with a man that makes her happy.'

Taylor nodded.

* * *

Ana was making sure she got everything she needed for the next day. Jamie gave her a very detailed list of products he was going to use to cook dinner. Since John wanted the best of the best for the great and genius, according to his owned words, Christian Grey, they had hired a chef for the night, two servers and even a cleaning team for earlier so they didn't miss anything.

John arrived from work looking very tired and carrying a few bottles of wine.

'Good evening, babe' he said placing the bottles on the kitchen counter.

'Hello' said Ana that was focused on her task.

'Do you think we are ready?'

'Yeah' she answer. 'You need to relax john. I'm pretty sure they are very normal people.'

'Well, I really hope we make a good impression, I want him to like me. That's a lot of points in the business world. He is financial royalty Ana. You know, he makes like a hundred thousand dollars per hour?'

Ana unconsciously drop a can of olives she was holding. _What?_ she thought, she didn't want to think about that, thinking about his money always made her feel uncomfortable. That was the thing always made her think he was playing with her, who would want someone so normal when he could have anybody. _Don't think about it don't think about it_ she repeated.

'Please, don't talk about money' she said to John, 'it's so rude.'

'Sorry' he said.

Actually that was one of the things she didn't like about John, he cared too much about money or impressing people. He got a very good job in Seattle, but she didn't consider herself rich, on the other hand John wanted to have the lifestyle of a rich person, that's why he bought a huge apartment in a fancy building, that's why he didn't want to ship their old furniture from home and he bought everything new.

She was so concentrated on her thoughts and putting everything in order that she didn't feel him coming. He hugged her from behind and started kissing her behind her ear.

'Why don't we relax, babe' he said on her ear.' I know I haven't been very attentive to you these past two weeks, I'm sorry…' he said while going down on her neck.

'John…' she felt very weird. He was his husband, they haven't had sex in a few weeks so feeling his warmness somehow made Ana feel good, she was just a woman after all. But she also couldn't stop thinking about Christian, as if she was betraying him. 'John, not tonight..., please.'

'What's the matter?' He said, his hands were starting to explore her hips.

'I'm tired, sorry. And actually' she said making some distance from him now. 'I have so much to do for tomorrow…'

John was a gentleman, he wasn't going to force her into having sex, but he was very frustrated.

'Ok', he said sighting. 'Do you need help with that?' And so they continued with their preparations for the next day…

* * *

Everything was set on the level 18th. The food smelled delicious, the place was shining and John and Ana were already dressed up. It was 5:50 in the afternoon and they were just waiting.

'Is it a tie too much? Maybe I should wear a suit not just a shirt with a casual jacket, we should have set a dressing code. What are they going to wear. What if they come very elegant…?'

'Calm down John, you are worrying too much. I think the tie is too much, I feel like he won't be wearing one.'

'How do you know?'

'I don't know, I said I feel like…' Ana actually knew, Christian asked in the morning. He wrote to wish her a good day and ask about the dressing code. They agreed to be casual, a dinner between friends, but Ana clearly forgot to share it with John.

Christian was ready, he was wearing a white shirt with a blue jacket and navy blue pants. He had his hands in his pockets, waiting for Jessica on the foyer, she was making sure Mia had everything she needed to babysit her niece. His sister was actually very good with kids, so he was not worried about that.

'We have to minutes!' he yelled to Jessica. 'I don't want to be late.' He was usually always on time and he was very anxious of seeing Ana. Though he wasn't prepared to see her with John.

'I'm coming' she replied, her voice was close. Christian called the elevator and got in, Jessica got inside a few seconds later. He pressed the number 18. It was just a matter of seconds.

* * *

I hope you like this chapter, it was a challenge to write it.

Thank you for your reviews, I really appreciate them.

I have said this before in other stories and I want to make sure it's clear now too. English is not my first language, so please, let me know if I'm not making myself understood. It would perfect if someone could help me with the edition on the chapters. Let me know by PM if there's someone interested.

Thank you so much for reading! ;)


	7. Dinner

Several of the characters belong to **E L James**

Than you so much for your kind reviews, I love reading them and they are a great guide when I'm writing.

I hope you enjoy this chapter :)

* * *

Seconds later the doors of the elevator opened and they were in the foyer of the Colts. It was beautifully decorated with flowers. It was a familiar place for Christian now.

John was ready to receive them as soon as he heard the bell and he rushed to the foyer. He felt relieved seeing Christian wearing casual dinner clothing.

'Mr Grey,' he said cordially. 'Welcome' he offered his hand for Christian to shake it.

'Good evening' he replied trying to be the most polite he could with John while making a quick scan for Ana, he didn't see her anywhere so he proceeded with the introduction. 'This is my wife. Jessica.'

'Mrs Grey, I'm John Colt, it's very nice meeting you.'

'Same, it's a pleasure' replied Jessica looking around at the beautiful flowers and noticing the predominant presence of violets.

Then Ana made her appearance, he saw her coming out by the kitchen doors. She was wearing a casual red dinner dress. Christian couldn't think of anyone more beautiful than her. How he would have liked to say it out loud, but he couldn't.

'You remember my wife, Anastasia?' said John proudly. Something in Colt's eyes and voice made him feel like his chest was burning.

Christian looked at Ana, trying to say with his eyes what he couldn't say in front of everybody.

'I do remember her. Of course.' He added looking straight at her blue eyes. 'Let me introduce you my... wife,' he said the last word almost ironically, but only Ana could really tell what he meant.

After acknowledging each other Ana invited them to the living room area where drinks and appetizers were ready.

'Please, let me show you the way' said John to Jessica offering his arm and they walked together to the other area of the apartment, leaving Christian and Ana behind them.

Not wasting the opportunity and taking the risk, Christian got very close to her and spoke on her ear. 'You look beautiful tonight,' he said while smelling her hair discretely.

Ana could feel the electricity passing through them, she felt weak on her knees, Christian hold her hand for just a second, she would have loved to get even closer but that was not the moment to do it, they needed to behave.

Letting go of his hand she took a deep breath. 'Let's go to the living room,' she said stepping away from him and walking towards the others, Christian followed her with a smile on his face.

A waiter was serving them wine. Christian sat next to Jessica and Ana did the same next to John in front of him, that was a cold shower for him considering the moment they just had. They had to pretend they were nothing, that they didn't know each other, that they didn't have feelings for each other and that was hurtful for him, the fact that things could have been so different made his heart ache.

He tried to focus on the conversation, but he couldn't really pay attention to Colt or Jessica that were leading the talk. The more he looked at Colt, the more annoyed he was. Colt's possession over Ana was driving him crazy, the way he had his arm around her waist was making his heart race or the way he had to discretely cares her while casually talking to them.

Ana was more focused on the conversation than Christian that seemed to be on very deep thoughts. It was a relief for her to see him behaving with his wife so coldly. She could tell he didn't love her, he was not really attentive to her, he wouldn't touch her or even laugh at her jokes. And what was even better was the fact that it looked as it was completely normal for Jessica, like she didn't care.

Ana could see a glimpse of sadness on a very short eye connection they made, only then she realized John was holding her very close to him, trying not to call much the attention she moved far enough to reach for an appetizer that John had to let go of her waist. A small smile appeared on Christian's lips.

He was feeling very miserable watching John so in love with Ana, they really looked as a newlywed couple, it was very hurtful to see Ana so comfortable with her husband's presence. _But she moved_ he thought, _she moved because she realized I wasn't comfortable_. And even though he felt confused about Ana's feelings for John he knew Ana loved him more.

On the other hand, John took Christian's absence of comments as if he was bored. He seemed to be somewhere else, and that was not the way he imagined his first social meeting with his dear Mr Grey, that made him lose confidence and get a bit nervous, so he was happy when Jessica brought up his name on the conversation.

Suddenly he heard his name and the three of them were looking at him, waiting for an answer. He was caught not paying attention, he had not idea what they were talking about.

Ana knew him too well to know he was not listening to any word they were saying so she spoke, trying to sound very casual, she could imagine why Christian was not paying attention.

'Your wife, Mr Grey, was saying that you play the piano quite well.' Said Ana.

'Yes..., yes I do' he replied trying to not make a big deal of him not paying attention. 'I learnt at a very young age and I really enjoy it' he added. 'It's one of the many things I do on my free time.'

'Do you get to practice enough?' Asked John, anxious to know more about him.

'Sure,' he replied. 'We actually have a piano at home, I can play all I want.'

'Of course you do' said John with admiration. 'How did you learn?'

'I started very early when I was around four.' He replied looking at Ana, that was actually new information for her. 'Is not just me, my siblings also play instruments, our mom was very strict in that way.'

One of the waiters told Ana that dinner was ready to be served so they passed to the dining room.

'You have done a great job decorating the place' said Christian trying to compliment Ana, of course.

'All the merit is for Ana' replied John proudly and smiling to Ana with that face that he was starting to hate.

'You have very good taste, Ana' added Christian.

'Thank you Mr Grey.' She blushed knowing what he meant.

'Stop with the Mr Grey thing, please. You can call me Christian.'

'Yes' said his wife. 'Call me Jessica, please.'

John felt so paid of himself in that moment. He felt so important. Like being part of the group he always wanted to join.

They started eating while doing small talk. Christian tried to focus this time, though he was getting distracted very easily by John's movements. He would grab her hand or just be very attentive to her and he was getting very jealous.

Another name in the conversation made him put more attention, they were talking about his daughter.

'I love the name Violet,' said Ana. 'That's actually my favourite flower.'

'Christian is obsessed with it too. ' Said Jessica. 'He picked the name up. He said something about the meaning… being a bridge…?'

'It's a metaphoric bridge between fantastic worlds and reality' Ana and Christian replied at the same time.

'Great minds think the same I guess' said Christian smiling widely, but looking at his plate not trying to be so obvious. It didn't matter what he had seen that night, Ana and him had history, they shared things, intimate moments.

This time was Ana that go lost on his smile. If possible he looks even more handsome when he smiles, she thought.

'I didn't know that' said John to Jessica. Christian felt like the king of the world now and he was not stopping...

'So I heard that description ten years ago' proceeded Christian, 'and I thought it was awesome, so meaningful, after that I always thought if I ever had a daughter I'd name her Violet.'

Ana's eyes were shining, she was looking at Christian in a very indecent way considering they were in front of her husband and his wife. The fact that he always remembered her words were a confirmation of everything Christian had said those recent days about him never forgetting her.

'You have a very good memory' she said then, 'you remember something that was told to you ten years ago.'

'It all depends on who said it' he added. 'Some people can really leave a mark on you, don't you think, Ana?'

'I bet,' she said.

'I heard you are actually very good with people,you can connect very well with your employees.' John added wanting to be part of the conversation.

'Where did you hear that?' asked Christian trying to hide the annoyance in his voice.

'Pretty much everywhere actually, but the first time I did were your own words on a financial magazine.'

'Well…, I guess I am then. I…' and he went on with the typical answer he would give to any journalist.

Christian hated that kind of talk, it made him feel like he was being interviewed instead of having a casual conversation, and the fact that John was bringing it up annoyed him even more. But Colt didn't seem to get enough. In fact, he wanted to know more about how Christian reached everything he did at such a young age.

Ana that was getting bored of John's talk and could feel everybody else was too interrupted him in the middle of one of her questions.

'John, I don't think Christian is comfortable with your interview' she said caressing just for a second his arm trying not to be mean.

Christian dissimulated his smile, it felt so good to be called by his name by her in presence of others. And also because she told Colt what everybody was thinking.

'I'm so sorry' said John a bit blushed. 'Of course, it's the weekend, we don't need to talk about work or bussines.'

'Don't worry about it, said Jessica. You are not the first or the last one to get too enthusiastic when talking about business with Christian.'

Ana felt that uncomfortable feeling again, the one she had every time she heard about how rich and powerful he was and Christian noticed the dark shadow crossing her eyes. He didn't want Ana to get scared by something he thought was so unimportant, so he brought up another subject.

'What do you guys do on your free time?' Said Christian, 'Jessica and I used to play tennis, there's a court close by that we can go.'

'We haven't play in a very long time,' she added thinking it was strange of Christian bringing up new plans to do with strangers, that wasn't typical of him. He must really like the Colts, she thought.

'I do play tennis' answered John. 'I was very good actually, won a couple of tournaments in college.'

'Oh, well I have to see that.' Said Christian looking at Ana with an expression that said I'm so much better, Ana almost couldn't stop herself from laughing.

The rest of the dinner went by talking about sports and different activities they did or used to do. Jessica was really happy that they could have a friendship with another couple, Christian never really wanted to hang out with anybody if he wasn't forced to do it. John was so pleased about it.

By dessert time Jessica and John were already making plans to have dinner at the Grey's the next week and maybe if they had time during the week they could have a tennis match. Ana on the other hand didn't know if she wanted to make Christian uncomfortable by John's attitude towards her. Christian didn't know if by the end of the week he would be still be living under the same roof with Jessica.

They were saying their goodbyes, it was past 11pm, the evening went by so fast but it couldn't have been slower for Ana and Christian, pretending to be strangers, not being able to be who they really were. Christian had everything clear now. Ana…, she just needed some time to make things right, but would Christian understand her?


	8. Accident

Several of the characters belong to **E L James**

Once again, thank you so much for your kind reviews.

Enjoy this chapter... or try to...

* * *

Jessica wouldn't stop talking about dinner. She was very happy that Christian wanted to hang out with them. They didn't do enough things together with mutual friends, she was always telling him that. Mia also wanted to know everything about it so Jessica told her how nice the Colts were and how they made everything so special for them.

Christian was trying to appear indifferent, but he was paying attention to her words, he wanted to hear what were her thoughts on Ana, so he was alert when she said her name.

'... and Ana is so smart,' Christian smiled on the inside. 'She has a column on a newspaper in Florida, and she is also looking for an editing job in the city…'

'Her name is Ana?' said Mia.

'Anastasia actually,' replied Jessica, 'but she goes by Ana.'

'That's weird...,' said Mia looking at her brother suspiciously.

'What?' asked Jessica.

'Nothing,' replied Christian fast. 'Mia is just jealous because her name is so short that it'll be weird if she started asking people to call her Mi.'

Jessica and Mia laughed, the second one understood the message. Probably Jessica doesn't know about that Ana/Anastasia that Christian met so many years ago, she thought.

'Are you sleeping here?' He asked to Mia changing the subject.

'No, I'm meeting Ethan. He will pick me up in five minutes.'

'Ok. great. I'm going to bed then. Have a good night you two.'

He walked to his room and started to change. He heard his phone vibrating somewhere tangled on his clothes, when he finally found it he saw a message from Mia.

 ***Keeping secrets from the wife, brother. It's not like it's the same Ana.***

Christian sighed. And replied.

 ***Please, let's not talk about that or I might think on cutting someone's allowance.***

 ***I won't say a word. XOXO.***

Christian put his suit on a hanger and walked out to the bathroom. He locked the door and took his tooth brush.

His eyes looked tired… no, he gestured to himself. He actually looked sad, he felt sad and threaten. Being with Ana every morning put him in a bubble. Only the two of them talking, catching up, being their normal selves. It was so different to being with their spouses. Because that was the problem. They were both married.

He was in an unhappy marriage, but what about her? Yes , she admitted she was not happy with him, but he could see John being attentive to Ana, knowing that she was his, he looked like the kind of guy that needed approval to feel secure, so the confident of having Ana he saw on him annoyed him. He could see one time after another they way he looked at her… so proud, passionate, so in love. He knew that look. He knew he had that look every time he looked or thought about her too.

He had said everything he felt to her, but she hadn't really say much about hers. He wasn't stupid, he could feel it, she loved him, but did she loved him as much as he loved her. Enough to finish her marriage and start a life with him? Then he thought of all the secret moments they shared that night. How great he felt having that connection with Ana, maybe he was overthinking this.

I just have to let things follow their course. He took his phone, he didn't want to go to sleep without saying something to her, so he wrote.

 ***My beautiful Ana. Thank you for everything, and you know I don't mean just the food. I'll be dreaming of you. Good night.***

Ana was getting out of her dress when she received his message. She felt so good to read it, she didn't want him to say those words to her on this period where they were just getting to know each other again, but reading those words after the torturous time they just had felt so good. John would be in the bathroom for a few minutes so she replied.

 ***Goodnight to you too. I can't wait to see you again on Monday. Tomorrow will be a very long day =(***

 ***Tell me about it. I'll text you during the day.***

Ana put on her night gown and made herself comfortable, she was ready to sleep now that she got to talk to Christian, but John had other plans…

* * *

When Christian woke up he was a in a very good mood, Ana's words gave him hope, just knowing she will missed him was enough for him. Jessica was nowhere to be seen, before going to check on his daughter he took his phone from the night table and wrote her another message.

 ***Good morning Ana. I woke up thinking of you. Have a good day. I have a family lunch so I might be busy.***

Ana was feeling so bad when she woke up. The realization of her nakedness and being next to John hit her as a rock. _What did you do?_ she thought.

Very carefully she got up of bed not waking John up and rushed to the bathroom locking the door. She avoided the mirror, she couldn't even look at herself. She filled the bathtub, trying to relax, trying not to think. She grabbed soap and a sponge and started cleaning herself.

Tears started falling down her face. _I'm sorry Christian_ , she thought, _I'm so sorry._

She scratched her skin so hard that her body was getting red spots.

How was she going to do this with the feelings she was having. Yes, John was her husband and those things happened, but she didn't love him. At the same time she didn't want to hurt him, but by not hurting him she was doing it to Christian.

What a stupid girl she was, if only she would had picked up the phone…

When she finally put herself together and got dressed up she saw his message. She didn't reply, not because she didn't want to, but because she couldn't.

* * *

It was the afternoon. Ana was trying to write, to somehow delete the memories of the last night. She was weak, but she run out of excuses for John, eventually having sex with him was something that was going to be inevitable, but she felt so bad. How was she supposed to face Christian now. It's not like they have talked about it, she didn't know if Christian was having sex with his wife anyways. But she knew he would notice something was wrong and she wouldn't be able to keep it a secret, he knew her too well and she was very bad lying.

Like reading her mind she got a message on her cellphone from him.

 ***Hi Ana. I wish I could call you to hear your voice. Are you ok? I haven't heard from you today. I'm really looking forward to seeing you tomorrow. I miss you.***

She replied.

 ***I miss you too. I'm ok, just busy writing. I have a job interview tomorrow, maybe... you shouldn't come.***

 ***I'm going, I'll be your lucky charm, I need to see you. Where is it?***

I need to see you too, she said to her phone, but she just replied to his question.

 ***SIP***

 ***I know people there, I can give you some tips.***

 ***Thank you.***

 ***No worries, I gotta go now, we just got home and Violet is a bit fussy. See you tomorrow, beautiful.***

* * *

'Make yourself comfortable, I'll be there in a second' said Ana from somewhere, probably her bedroom, he thought. She didn't speak with the usual uplifting voice.

He went to the living room and sat down. Now sitting there by himself he paid real attention to the apartment for the first time.

Everything was very cozy, and warm. The furniture was all made of crafted wood, the chairs and sofas matched their brown leather. They had an electric fireplace, surrounded by stones that made it look like a real one, he stand up and get closer to see the pictures on top of it.

There were three frames. Ana with her parents. John with his. And the last one… he grabbed it, it was Ana and John on their wedding day. Ana was smiling to the camera and John was staring at her with that look he was starting to hate.

'What are you doing?' Asked Ana entering the room.

'You looked beautiful…' he said showing her the picture, his voice very low.

Ana reached him and took the frame from his hands. 'Don't do that…' she told him, her voice also low. 'Don't make things harder for you…' He looked at her, her eyes looked at bit red, was she crying?

'Are you feeling ok this morning?' he asked concerned.

'Yeah… I'm just a little bit nervous about the interview.' Mmm…, he knew she was lying.

'Don't worry about it, you will be awesome. You are perfect for them, they are looking for young people. What position are you applying for?'

'Editor.'

'Even better, the CEO is a cool guy, just be your usual smart self and he will love you. Not as much I do though' he added.

'Christian…'

'Sorry, I shouldn't break the rules' he said.

'Do you want coffee this morning?' She asked sounded like not really paying attention to him.

'Sure' he replied not liking at all the way she was acting.

'What time is you interview?' Maybe the idea of a new plan will cheer her up, he thought. 'I have pretty much all day free, I'm thinking, why don't we go somewhere? I'm a bit sick of hiding ourselves in this place.'

'I can't today' said Ana not looking at him. She was avoiding him for some reason.

'What else do you have to do?'

'I have to write and I…' she swallowed 'I don't feel too well.'

'What's the matter, Ana?'

'Nothing…' she replied but her voice broke and a tear run down her face.

'No, something happened and I want to know what is it.' He didn't want to pressure her, but seeing Ana suffering made him feel sad himself, he wanted to hug her, hold her in his arms, but maybe it was not a good idea. Since she didn't reply he asked again. 'Did I do something to upset you?' was he being too pushy? maybe she was just nervous, no, that couldn't be it.

'No, you haven't done anything wrong' she said.

'Then what? Did he do something to you?' Ana didn't say anything, he felt his heart racing now. 'What did he do to you Ana?!'

'Nothing bad Christian' though she didn't feel that way. 'We… we made love the other night... and I've been feeling...'

'Stop talking.' He said cutting her in the middle of her explanation. He lost all color on his face, he was pale.

'Christian… he is my husband. I can't say no all the time.'

'I don't want to hear this...' He was looking lost… 'Do you want to hurt me or something?' He ended up saying.

'No..., Christian no. I'm just being honest.'

'Well, I don't want your honesty right now!'

'But you asked me.' She said frustrated and a bit desperate.

'Are you gonna tell me you are confuse now.'

'I… I'm not confuse.'

'Why then, why did you do it!?' said Christian. He felt like his heart was going to explode, his hands were shaking. Not only he had in mind all the images from the dinner, but also this now. He couldn't bare the thought of Ana in the arms of John. 'Ana, why did you do it!?'

'Stop acting crazy Christian, are you gonna tell me you don't have sex with your wife?'

'I don't' he said. 'I don't Ana. You know why, 'cause I don't fucking love her!' He yelled.

Ana didn't know what to say, she woke up feeling bad but Christian's confession made her feel miserable. She felt like the worst human being in the world.

'I can't look at you right now. I'll talk to you later.' He said and walked to the elevator.

'Don't do this Christian please.' Plead Ana.

'I'm not doing this, you did this' he said.

'No…' those words hurt even more, 'don't leave me…' She walked towards him, but this time was him that stepped back.

'Bye, Ana.'

Christian got into his car and drove as fast as he could away from Escala, away from Ana. He got to the freeway and step on the speed. He was numb, but he could feel his heart racing. He couldn't think clearly. He decided to keep driving, on and on. His phone rang several times, it was Ana. He didn't answer. He got a message, another one. He didn't look at them. He didn't care now, he felt like his heart was getting broken in a thousand pieces.

Why life had to be such a bitch, he thought. If she would only answered ten years ago things could have been so different. His sweet and smart Ana. Was he being unreasonable? They were married after all, John was in love with her. He obviously would insist on sleeping with her. I can't say no all the time she told him, so she had denied to him before…

He would have to get used to the fact that until she made a clear decision he would have to share Ana with John. He needed to calm down and talk to her, listen to what she had to say. So he decided to turn and go see her. He couldn't just leave her like that.

But he was driving too fast, and everything seemed blurry he didn't see the log on the middle of the road. He lost control of the car, he felt it crashing onto something and his body being held inside the car only by the seatbelt, his neck hurt, the car crushed into a lamp post, broking the front window, the airbag went active, he felt pain on his right arm, the lid had hit it and he could taste blood on his mouth, he passed out.


	9. Hospital

Several of the characters belong to **E L James**

* * *

Ana had to put all her feelings aside and go to the interview, she actually did a good job and hopefully she would get it by the end of the week. But even though she seemed confident, the true is she was desperate. Christian was not answering his phone or replying to her messages, that by now were countless, she tried one more time to call him but this time she was sent to the voice mail. She needed to explain everything to him, she wasn't confused, he needed to know that.

She wasn't hungry, but decided to stop by the nearest coffee shop she could find to take a moment for her and think, because after being at home the last few weeks she needed to go out.

She found one very close, bought a coffee and sat down on a comfortable chair. The TV was on, they were were broadcasting the midday news. They were talking about politics, she didn't really pay attention, but then one of the cafe employees turned the volume higher. They had interrupted the normal transmission, Ana looked at the TV, for some reason she felt unease, and she knew why soon.

' _We received confirmation that Christian Grey was involved in a car accident…'_ she could see the smashed car on the footage they were showing, and the ambulance carrying a body on a stretcher. _'We don't have information about his state of health, but he was unconscious when he was found…'_

Ana felt weak, Christian had to be ok. She didn't know what to do, she picked up her phone and tried calling him one more time, she didn't care who would answer. Her hand was shaking, the only answer was the voice mail again.

She left the phone on the table and covered her face with her hands, trying to hold the tears, thinking of what to do to get information. Ana was distracted by her phone, she looked at it hopeful, but it was John. She didn't answer, the least she wanted to do was talk to him.

She was blaming herself. _Why did I tell him? I shouldn't have said anything. It's all my fault._ She was thinking. Then she remembered that Jessica gave her their number, so they could talk about the next dinner. Ana left the cafe and went back to Escala. She was impressed to see cameramen and photographers outside, there was security outside the building only letting residents get in. The fact that Christian was attracting so much attention made her realized how important he was. She already knew of his success, thanks to John, but seeing it with her eyes was different.

Ana rushed to her floor, she found the card with the number on John's office. Her phone rang again while dialing the number to Christian's apartment. It was her husband.

'Yes!' she said, her voice irritated.

'Hey, are you ok?' said her husband aware of her tone.

'I'm ok' she said trying to soften her voice.

'Did you see the news?' he asked.

'Yes, I was about to call Jessica to ask about him.' She said rolling her eyes.

'Great, let me know, I hope he is fine, the images of the car are awful...,' Ana stopped paying attention to him, she didn't want to think about it.

'Yeah' she said, 'I'll tell you if I can reach her. Bye.' She said cutting off the call. John just wanted to comment the news and she was dying to know. The anguish and frustration she was feeling were enough.

She dial the number and waited.

'Grey's residence. Housekeeping speaking.' Said a woman kindly.

'Hello,' she said trying to sound calm.'This is Anastasia Colt, can I talk to Jessica please.'

'Mrs Grey is not here at the moment, do you want to leave a message?' asked the woman with gentle tone.

'I'm actually calling to know about Christian... Do you know something?'

'All I know is that he was taken to the hospital, Mrs Colt. I'm also waiting to know more.' Ana could feel she was also worried.

'Thank you,' said Ana, silent tears were falling from her eyes. 'Please let Jessica know I call and if she needs anything she just need to let me know.'

'I'll give her you message Mrs Colt. Have a good day.'

What else could she do but wait. She hated it, having no right over Christian she couldn't do much, she couldn't go to the hospital or it would be suspicious, she was getting desperate, she needed to see him, to know he wasn't in any danger. She needed to tell him she was sorry and that she made a choice.

* * *

Christian woke up feeling his eyelids very heavy. He could listen to the beeping sound of the machine measuring his heart beats. He tried to adjust his body, but he felt some pain. He had a neck brace so he couldn't even look at his body properly. He could see he was wearing bandages in his right arm.

The nurse entered the room then. 'Mr Grey you're awake! Are you feeling any pain?' she asked while checking the machines.

'Yes, I'm a bit sore,' his voice was hoarse and it was hard to talk with the brace on his neck. Plus he felt his face burning when he talked, he remembered now the window braking. 'Can I get some water?'

'She put something on the IV, then poured water on a glass and helped him drink it.

'I need to see someone,' he said.

'Your wife will come in in a few minutes. She is talking to the doctor.'

'No, I need to see Taylor, my security man.' He said not giving it much thought.

'You are not allowed to have visitors, only your closest family, Mr Grey.'

He took a deep breath. 'Why not? I feel great.'

'You need rest,' she said very calm while doing her things. 'Do you still have pain?'

'No'

'The doctor will see you soon now that you are awake. If you need something just press the red button on your left.'

Christian didn't say anything, he had to figure out a way of seeing Taylor and Ana. The doctor came in and asked him a few question while putting a flashlight on his eyes and checking his file.

'I need to see my security guy' he repeated to the doctor.

'Sorry, you need rest. I'm sure you can wait until tomorrow.' He replied very calm. 'You can talk to your wife though, you have five minutes.'

A few minutes later Jessica got into the room looking worried. Christian wasn't really paying attention to her.

'How do you feel?' she asked, her voice matched her look.

'I'm ok' he gave her the usual cold treatment.

'Why…, why were you going so fast?' Christian rolled his eyes.

'I guess I was just being stupid' he said. 'Is Taylor outside?'

'Yeah, of course. Everybody is.'

'I just need to see Taylor, send him in.'

'The nurse said you can't have visitors…'

'I don't fucking care about what the nurse said. I need to see Taylor now!' The beeping of the machine got faster, he tried to calm down. The least he wanted was to get worse.

'You need to rest…' she said without conviction, she knew that Christian would get away with whatever he wanted, but for once she thought he might wanted to be with her in that moment, she was disappointed.

'I'll rest when I see Taylor.'

Jessica went out looking for Taylor, the nurse wasn't there, which worked out perfectly, Taylor and Jessica could get into the room.

'Mr Grey' said Taylor with his deep voice. Christian tried to smile but he felt the little cuts on his face. He saw Jessica waiting by the door.

'I need to talk to Taylor.' Said Christian sharply.

'But…' she started to say.

'Mrs Grey. I'll take care of him.' Jessica left.

'Sir?'

'I need you to tell Ana I'm fine. You must have her number.'

'Yes sir.'

'I also have to talk to her. Make her come.'

'You have not visits al…'

'I know!' he said annoyed. 'But you can arrange something.' Taylor nodded. 'Do you happen to know about my phone?'

Taylor search on his pockets. He showed it to Christian. The iPhone had the screen smashed, you could only see some blue and yellow on the superior part of the screen, the rest was all black.

'It stills vibrates, but you can't see anything on the screen, I haven't answered.'

'Good. Get me a new phone, please'

'Anything else?'

'Make sure my family leaves to rest, I'm fine. I don't want anybody here that can see Ana.'

'I'll figure,' said Taylor.

'How's the press?'

'They are trying to get information, they only have the footage of the place of the accident.'

'Tell Kate to give a statement that I'm ok. The building is secured?'

'Yes, I have people here and at Escala.'

'Good job T. Am I in trouble?'

'They might take your license away for a few months and you will have to pay for the damage.' Christian sighed. 'Your father's firm is taking care.'

'Not a big deal at least. Well, I'll be waiting.'

'Do you want to see your wife?'

'Tell her I'm sleeping.'

Taylor gave it a thought for a few seconds, but didn't say anything about it. 'Yes sir.'

* * *

Around four in the afternoon her phone rang, it was an unknown number. Her hands were shaking when she reached her phone. The news hadn't given any new information yet. 'Hello?'

'Mrs Colt' said a man's voice. 'This is Jason Taylor. I work for Mr Grey' he said.

'How is he?' she asked right away.

'He is fine Mrs Colt. He just woke up and asked me to call you. He's requesting to see you.'

Ana smiled, he was fine and he wanted to see her. 'Yes, I'll go' she replied.

After Taylor gave her the information she needed, Ana rushed to the hospital, there was some press outside, Ana could hear on the car an official statement that was given to the media.

She walked fast to the floor Taylor told her to, and followed his indications. 'Mrs Colt.' A tall man, that looked like a bodyguard approached her. She recognized the voice. 'Follow me' he said, while walking Taylor gave her information about Christian's condition. 'He is not allowed to have visitors. Don't worry…' he said reading her expression, 'he is not under any danger, he just needs rest and is under several pills. He woke up and requested talking to you promptly. I bought you some minutes with the nurse, but I can't assure you how long that would be and if Mr Grey will be awake or conscious.'

'And you have nothing to worry about,' he proceeded, 'Mrs Grey went back home with Mr Grey's family, they'll be back tomorrow morning, and I have his phone, is not working though.'

By his words she knew Taylor knew a lot, and she was grateful, the fact that he did as Christian told him.

'Thank you' she said

Taylor nodded, gave a little knock on the door and opened it for Ana.

Christian was lying on the bed, he looked better than in her imagination, he had a few cuts on his face that weren't deep, and he was wearing bandages on his arm. He was also wearing a neck brace. She couldn't stop blaming herself, she did this to him, he looked so vulnerable like that. She got closer and carefully hold his hand. Electricity joined them.

His gray eyes opened and met hers, he gave her a small smile, she could tell he was under a lot of sedatives because he couldn't keep his eyes focus on her or opened for long. And in fact Christian was trying hard not to fall asleep waiting for her, but the painkillers were strong.

'Ana…' he said with relief. He couldn't open much his mouth and his voice was very low. 'I'm sorry baby. Please, forgive me.' he said.

'Don't be sorry, Christian' she replied, 'I'm sorry. I upsated you…' she was caressing his forehead softly, Christian was trying to keep his eyes opened.

'I thought things through, before the accident,' he said and swallowed, 'I understand Ana. I'll do anything it takes to be with you, even if I have to share you.'

The fact that he was saying it melted her heart, but that didn't mean she agreed with him. 'No.' She said confident 'I don't want you to do that. I made my decision, Christian. We'll talk about this when you are better.'

Christian seemed gone for a few seconds. When he opened his eyes again Ana could see Christian's question in the grey of them.' She got closer to his ear and gave him the answer he was waiting for.

'This time I made the right decision, don't worry about it now' she lift her head to see his eyes shining.

Christian's voice was harder to understand when he spoke again

'Lay down with me' he said.

'I can't,' she said giving him a smile, you have injuries, 'I don't want to hurt you.'

'You won't… Please,' he insisted. 'There's enough space' he was barely opening his lips to talk.

Ana carefully place herself next to him on the side of his good arm. He was warm. She passed one arm over his waist and placed her head on his chest absorbing his smell, his pureness in that moment, how could she ever let him go like she did, but not this time.

'I love you' he said, it was not the best scenario to say it or the most romantic, but it felt so good to hear it after the awful day they had had.

'And I love you' she replied.

Christian fell asleep, a few minutes later Taylor knocked the door. Ana gave Christian a kiss on his forehead and walked outside feeling wonderful.

'Thank you Mr Taylor' said Ana, I'm very grateful with you.

'No problem Mrs Colt.'

'Are you going home?'

'I'm staying' he said, 'that's my job, something in his voice told her that he was not just staying because it was his job, but because he was fond of Christian.

'Would you like a coffee?' offered Ana. 'Since you are staying…'

Taylor was caught out of guard.

'I'll be right back' said Ana smiling to him. 'Sugar? Milk? Cream?' Asked ana.

'Cream, please' he replied.

Ana went to the cafeteria and bought two coffees and some snacks. She gave him one and sat next to him for a few minutes.

Taylor really appreciated the gesture.

'Take care of him, please.'

'I will' he said sincerely.

They said their goodbyes and Ana left, knowing that that good man will look after her love.


	10. Hospital II

Several of the characters belong to **E L James**

Thank you for everything! I'll be waiting to know what you think ;)

* * *

Ana went back home like being carried by clouds, the fact that Christian was alright and that she finally told him that she loved him gave her peace of mind, she would think about John later, but now she wanted to cherish the moment of just being with Christian.

She walked into the apartment looking for her phone, she had it off to avoid interruptions, it was five past six in the afternoon. She had a few missed calls from John, some messages as well. Distracted she headed to the kitchen to make herself some tea.

'Where have you been?' Said John making Ana give a little jump. 'I've been worried about you, you haven't been answering my calls.' His tone was between mad and puzzle, Ana had been acting weird all day with him.

'I needed some air and went out for a walk' she said very calmly.

'At least you should have left a note or something. Since you weren't going to answer my calls...' he said.

'I'm sorry, I wanted some alone time. Besides you are never home early now, I didn't think it could be a problem' answered Ana while pouring water on the kettle.

'I thought we could have dinner together.' He said in his usual calm voice now and sitting on the kitchen island.

'Oh, I don't have anything, sorry. I could cook something fast.' she replied distracted looking for a couple of cups and putting them in front of John.

'That's okay, I brought take out.' he said showing her the paper bags that he left on top of the stove. 'Are you sure you are ok?'

'I'm perfectly fine' she replied smiling. _Better than never_ , she thought.

There was something different about her, she looked fresh, radiant. What put her in such a good mood? he thought. Still looking at her suspiciously he remembered the call from the Greys.

'Jessica called, Christian is fine, just needs rest.'

Ana smiled 'that's excellent news' she said. 'Do you want to eat here or at the dining room?' she asked him.

'Here is fine. So, he will have to stay at the hospital, but x-rays and everything seemed fine.'

After Ana put everything ready to serve and John put on some comfortable clothes they started their dinner. She was thinking on how would it be to be having dinner with Christian after a long day at work. How would life be with him.

John kept talking about his day, about how important it is everything he's doing, and of course, about the accident. It was impossible for Ana to keep track of everything he was saying. Somehow John was being very selfish and selve absorvent lately, he didn't even asked her about her job interview. I will feel like part of a team with Christian she thought. It won't be so lonely...

'...and tomorrow I'll be very busy, in case I don't call, but I was thinking maybe we can go to the hospital early to check on Christian or at least to support Jessica.'

'Yes,' answered Ana right away, if going with John was the price she had to pay to see Christian the next day she would pay it. 'Great idea.'

'Cool then, I wonder if there is press outside the hospital too, maybe I should wear my fancy suit...

Ana rolled her eyes, that was all that matter to John, to be noticed...

* * *

'Christian should be somewhere on the fourth floor…' said John reading the signs, Ana had to act like she didn't know were he was. They were looking at a map. 'I think I know where I'm going' he said and head to the direction that Ana knew was right. It was very early, she was not expecting to see Christian, he must be resting, but John insisted on going before he had to leave to work.

Ana saw Taylor on the distance, seated outside Christian's room. He looked tired but fine, he said he was going to nap. From a nearby hallway Jessica appeared, she was walking with another woman around her age, blonde, very elegant and modern, suddenly she recognized her, just a few seconds later they noticed their presence too and the blonde lady didn't hide her excitement.

'Oh my God! Anastasia Steel!' she said walking towards her and giving her a hug.

'Kate! Is so nice to see you. What are you doing here?'

'My brother in law had an accident and I also happen to be his PR Manager' she said smiling. 'What are you doing here?'

'We are here to see Christian Grey.' Said John that couldn't allow to be left behind. 'You are Kate Grey.' he said, Ana looked at him in shock.

'Grey?' She asked

'Yeah' she said, 'I got married so now I'm a Grey' she said not giving it much importance, 'I can't believe you are here to see Christian, how do you know him?'

Jessica approach them now. 'We are neighbours' she answered

'It's a small world!' Kate said and continued talking to Ana, not really looking at Jessica when she talked 'When did you move here? I can't believe this, we studied together for a semester in college, by the way' she said explaining to John. 'I wanted to try a sunnier environment for a change… And what is your name? She ask him.

'Oh yeah, I'm so sorry. He is my husband, John Colt.' Replied Ana introducing him.

'Pleased to meet you' he said and they shaked hands. 'How is Christian? I wanted to check before going to work.'

'He is fine' replied Jessica, he should be out of the hospital tomorrow morning. The only reason he is not being released today is because he is stubborn and he won't rest at home.'

'Is he awake?' asked Ana hoping she would get to see him today.

'He comes and goes said Jessica. He is under pills, but they should reduce the sedative soon. I'll go check on him, actually' she said. 'Excuse me,' she left by the door.

'I gotta make some calls, don't leave without giving me your number Ana, I can't believe we didn't keep in touch, we have to go out soon to have a drink, dinner, whatever' she said walking away and dialing a number on her cellphone.

'How did you know her name?' Asked Ana to John.

'She is a famous financial journalist and the PR Manager of the most powerful businessman of Seattle' he said like talking about the weather.

She was happy to see Kate, between everything that was going on she was glad to meet an old friend. But she was married to Elliot, and Elliot knew her, she thought she finally found someone she could trust, but knowing she was relative of Christian maybe it was not a great idea. 'John, would you grab me a coffee please? she asked him.

'Sure' he replied, 'if I can find the cafeteria.'

'I think I saw one on the first floor.' she said.

'I'll be right back.'

Ana sat next to Taylor. 'She is married to Elliot' she said.

'I'm sorry, I didn't know you met her before.'

'Don't apologize' said Ana. 'It's not your fault.'

'You shouldn't worried about Mr Elliot or his wife, even so, probably Mr Grey will take care of it. And Mr Elliot had to travel to Vancouver last night, he won't be here today.'

'Thank you' she said relief. 'Did you get any sleep?'

'I did, more than I thought' he said. Then Christian's door opened and Jessica went out. She looked pale, and sick. Taylor stand up, Ana followed his action.

'Is he ok?' he ask, Ana also got worried.

'Yes, he is fine' she said with that voice that indicates she was avoiding to cry. 'He wants to see you' she said to taylor. Taylor nodded and got in.

'Are you ok?' Asked Ana worried about her now. A silent tear started to fall from Jessica's face. Maybe it was the shock of seeing Christian or did something happened inside?

'I'm ok,' she replied. 'Can I ask you something? If Taylor or Kate ask for me, tell them I went home.'

Ana didn't know what to think about her behavior, she nodded to Jessica and she walked away fast. Ana felt so bad, was something related to her? And so without announcing herself, she opened the door of Christian's room and walked inside closing it on her back, both men looked at her.

'What did you say to her?' Ask Ana. Christian had a worried look.

'I told her to go home…' he said, his voice sounded more like him now.

'Why? Why you tell her that?'

'Why are you so mad at me?'

'Because we are already hurting people!' Said Ana louder than expected and trying to avoid the tears.

'Taylor…' said Christian.

'I'll be outside, sir.' Taylor left.

'Come here, baby' he said softly. Ana gave a few steps towards him.

'I know what you are going through,' said Christian, 'but if we are going to do this, even if we hurt people on the way, we have to do it, if we want to be completely happy we have to be free of them.'

'But at least you could avoid being mean to her. Because if you are makes me feel like I'm being the bad person.'

'I'm sorry. I'll be better, it's just that I don't want to feel guilty later. I don't want her to stay here and be a caring wife when I'm going to ask her for a divorce, I don't want to owe her anything…' Ana got closer, enough now for him to grab her hand and kiss it. 'I'm happy to see you so early, I was wondering if I would be with you today.'

'How did you sleep?' She asked more calm, she knew Christian was right but she felt very bad for Jessica.

'I woke up a few times because of the neck brace, it's uncomfortable. What about you?'

'It was ok,' she said and smiled, 'I slept all night on my side of the bed.' Christian laughed.

'That makes me so happy' he said. Ana lean, even in that situation they could find a happy moment together. She passed her fingers through his hair, looking at his eyes, this time he could look back at her. She was looking at his lips, should she do it… she was dying to do it, so she lower her head more, they both closed their eyes…

Knock, knock…

Alarmed, Ana put herself together and Christian let go of her hand. Both frustrated. Ana walked to the door and opened it, it was, of course John.

'Oh Ana, you are here. If my wife is here why didn't you just let me in?' he said in a very conceited voice.

Christian more than ever felt like punching him in the face.

'John!' Said Ana. 'Don't be rude.'

'I'm… sorry' he said to Taylor not really caring and entered the room.

'You won't make it in the business world talking to people like that,' said Christian with her teeth clenching.

'I was looking for Ana, he said she was here, and then he wouldn't let me in.'

'That's because I say when people can see me or not,' said Christian breathing heavily. John went completely red, he was not feeling important at all now.

He swallowed and proceeded. 'How do you feel today?' he asked, you could tell by his voice he was embarrassed.

'I'm great,' said Christian, 'I would be working by now if it were my call.'

'Well, I'm happy to hear it, in fact I need to go to work. Sorry for the short visit. I hope you can be home soon. Please excuse, me. Ana?' He said. Ana gave a look to Christian and went out with John.

'I have to talk to Kate before leaving, you can go, I'll take a cab or walk, it isn't far from home.'

'Sure' he said not even paying attention to her. 'See you later' he said walking away.

'I'm sorry' said Ana to Taylor, 'he has… power issues.'

'You don't need to worry about it… Mrs Colt.'

'Please, call me Ana.'

'That wouldn't be right' he said as if Ana had said something very serious. Ana couldn't replied back because Kate was back.

'Ana, I'm happy you are still here, here is my card. Give me a call, tonight is perfect, Elliot is away' she said. 'I was talking to the in laws, they will be here soon, you are gonna love them!'

'I can't stay, sorry. But I'll be happy to call you later' she said.

'Oh, well I'll be waiting.'

Kate looked at her phone, 'oh speaking of the devil. I'll see you tonight.' She said and going back to her phone… 'hi baby…'

'Can I say goodbye?' Said Ana to Taylor.

'Mrs Colt, you are the one person that doesn't need to ask for permission.' For some reason Ana felt weird.

'Thank you' said Ana and gave a little knock this time.

'What a jerk' said Christian when he saw her.

'Don't think about him, he is gone.'

'Are you staying?'

'I don't think is smart to stay, your parents will be here soon.'

'They are going to love you.' Ana didn't want to think about that yet.

'I already knew Kate,' she said.

'Oh, where?'

'She did a semester in my university, we had a few writing classes together. We were friends, but we didn't keep in touch until now.'

'Does she know…?'

'No. I never talked to anybody about you, it was easier…'

'I see… don't worry about Elliot, he is cool.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yeah.'

'Are... Kate and Jessica close friends….?'

'No, in fact I don't think they like each other much.'

'Oh really?'

'Yeah, but Kate is very professional and Jessica plays her part good when not family members are present…'

'Why don't they like each other?'

'I couldn't say…, I think they tried to be friends but I think they had an argument or something…'

Ana thought of those things, could she trust Kate? 'I think I should leave now.' Christian pout. 'There will come a time when nothing or no one will separate us' said Ana with her sweet voice.

'I'm counting on it' he replied. Ana leaned again and kissed his forehead. 'See you tomorrow?' She said.

'Please.' He replied. Ana walked to the door and about to open it she turned.

'Take care of yourself, I love you' said Ana.

Christian smiled, 'I love you more' he replied and Ana left.


	11. Digging in the past

Several of the characters belong to **E L James**

Well... let me know what you think.

Thank you for all the support.

* * *

Christian was pulling his carry-on bag and holding Ana's hand. They were walking to the security gate, his holiday was over and he was flying back to Seattle. He should have come back a week before with Elliot, his brother, but he changed his mind. The true was he wasn't ready to say goodbye yet, but of course he didn't express that to her, he just told her that he needed more sun.

Ana didn't want to show how sad she was. They both agreed it was a summer thing and neither of them believed in long distance relationships. Ana knew it was too good to be true, and besides, how a man like him would wanted her for a serious relationship, just starting college only waitressing for the summer, and they were way too young to have a commitment.

They got to the security gate. Christian swallowed and turned to see Ana face to face. 'Well then… this is goodbye' he said trying to sound cool while seeing those blue eyes for the last time.

'Have a safe trip' she said, her voice a little higher than usual.

'So… bye then.' Christian gave her a hug, he could smell her hair, for a second he thought he couldn't let go.

'Bye' replied Ana on his chest pulling him off from his hug. He let go and headed to the line to be checked. This was one of the greatest summers of his life, he didn't want to end it, or at least not just like that. He didn't get to tell her what she meant to him, that he loved her, because he did, he was in love with her. He turned to see if Ana was there waiting… but she wasn't, it was his turn at the gate.

As soon as Christian walked towards the other direction Ana rushed out of the airport, not looking back. By the time she got to her car she was breathing uneasily. _I'm ok_ , she said to herself, this was going to be a beautiful memory. Sort of like her own tragic love story like the ones she liked reading. She wanted to be tough, she wasn't the kind of girl that would cry over a guy, but oh boy she felt like doing it. _This is for your own good Ana_ , she said to herself, _is better this way, you are avoiding getting you heart broken..._

* * *

Ana was getting everything set up at her new dorm. It was a cozy place, not too big but at least she had her own room with a mini fridge, a decent closet and a desk. She was almost done unpacking when it happened for the first time, her cell phone started ringing, the caller ID showed Christian… she sat on her bed just looking at the screen. About to lose her willpower it stopped. Now the screen was showing a missed call.

What could he want from her anyway. And even though she was dying to just hear his voice, there wasn't a point on doing so. Besides, she needed to focus in her studies. She was going to be strong.

* * *

Five months had passed, he was losing hope and was desperate, but what was he supposed to do, it was obvious she didn't want to talk to him. He fell with her, but she didn't really love him as much as he did, and he would have to accept it. But maybe he could persuade her, maybe if he fly there or try to find her… _what's the point?_ said a voice in his head, _if she doesn't want to talk to you she won't want to see you either._

'This is the last time, I swear' he said to Elliot and Ros. They were hanging out at his apartment.

'Bro, you have to get over her.' said Elliot holding him by the shoulder as an act of support.

Christian sighed. 'Last time' he repeated.

'Ok,' said Ros. 'But this is what we are going to do, try for the last time, if she doesn't answer we are going to delete her number from your phone.'

'That's a great idea' said Elliot. 'You need to get out there and have some fun, meet new girls.' Christian thought about it. Was that something he wanted to do? He knew Elliot was right, he needed to move on…

'Ok' he said. 'I'll delete it' he said unsure.

He called her one last time…

…

…

Nothing…

After the mail voice went on he hanged up.

He looked at his phone for several minutes. He left it on the side and stand up.

'Do it, Elliot knows the password, you can stay if you want' he said and walked to his room.

* * *

'Why the fuck did you do it!' Cried Christian to his brother bursting in by the dining doors of their parents' house. He had drove all the way there to confront Elliot, because what else could he do. All his family looked at him alarmed.

'What happened son? Why are you so upset?' Asked his father worried.

Christian was breathing uneasily, he moved a chair and sat, defeated. 'He deleted my pictures…' he said like a little kid telling on his brother. 'He deleted Ana's pictures…'

Everybody looked at him with a bit of pity. 'Why did you do it Elliot?' asked their mother calmly, trying to be fair with both of them.

'It was for your own good, Christian. We agreed on it, you have to move on.'

'We only said her number…' he replied not looking at anybody, like talking to the wind.

'We wanted to make sure you'll do your word. I'm sorry'

'Have you eaten son? I'll ask for a sit.' Said his mom after a very long silence.

'I'm not hungry' said Christian, he felt so depressed, he could have cried if he wouldn't be in front of everybody. 'I'm sorry if I interrupted' he said. 'I'll just go home…'

* * *

Christian had to see his best friends starting relationships, falling in love, getting marry, being happy, but he was alone, he never found any connection with anybody, he couldn't stop thinking about Ana even though 7 years had passed, he never had more than a night stand with girls.

'Son, you should find a good girl and get marry, start a family.' Started his father during breakfast one day. 'Your mother and I are worried about you. We don't see you enough, and when we do, you seem to be in another planet. And I know you are not worried about work, things seemed to be very good.'

Christian took a sip of his coffee. 'It isn't as easy as that, dad. You think I want to be alone?'

'Of course not son, but I think you are not really trying hard enough. You know, I have this lawyer at the firm, he has a very nice daughter, maybe I could set up a date… who wouldn't want to have a date with you?'

Christian looked at him frowning. 'That's the problem dad, they don't want me for what I am, they want me for what I have.'

'I understand, but just have a date son..., don't look at me like that. It won't hurt anybody. You have to think you are going to be 30 soon, you are one of the richest men in America, you need a family, you need a heir, won't you like to have a son?...'

* * *

The three friends were hanging out for the last time at his bachelor apartment, from tomorrow on it was going to be a shared place. He was drinking, trying to calm himself down, not really succeding thinking about the next day.

'You are going to love the marriage life,' said Ros, 'it is something very powerful on knowing that you belong to someone and that someone belongs to you.'

'Mmm…' he replied, his real thought was, _that's because you love your wife._

'Everything will be all right' said Elliot, 'you know, is not as hard as people picture it, and you get to have sex, it doesn't stop after you get marry,' he said trying to joke about it.

'I wish I have what you both have' he said. 'I'm really trying…' Ros and Elliot had the same thought, should they let him do it knowing he had doubts...?

* * *

Kate was walking to the kitchen when she saw Christian sleeping on a sofa of their living room. Elliot followed her a few seconds later, grabbed her hand and took her to the kitchen.

'What's he doing here?' she asked puzzled.

'He showed up last night, he was drunk and talking some nonsense...' he did not look at Kate when saying it, he will always feel guilty about letting his brother marrying a woman he didn't love.

'Why. What is going on?' she was worried about him, when they met each other Christian was already very kept to himself, but now he just looked so unhappy all the time. 'They still don't get along, do they?' she said while their cook started to serve them breakfast.

Christian woke up disoriented, realizing where he was. He could hear voices coming from the kitchen so he walked in. The light was on and it bothered his eyes, he had a headache… he hated to be hangover.

'Morning' he said.

'Good morning' said both of them. 'Hangover little bro?'

'Mmm…' answered Christian.

'How are you?' asked Kate.

'I'm not sure how to answer that, what happened last night?' he asked embarrassed.

Elliot shrugged his shoulders before answering 'Taylor dropped you here, he said you didn't want to go to your home and that you wanted to be here, in a really happy place.' Christian listened trying to remember. 'Then you said you…' Elliot swallowed. 'Then you said you were going to get a divorce. After that I told you to use one of the guests' rooms but you said you didn't wanted to be a bother and you sort of passed out on the couch.'

Kate looked at Elliot startled. She didn't want to say anything, she just got up and put a cup with coffee in front of Christian who had grabbed his head with both hands. He didn't remember that, but he could remember the argument he had with Jessica. Which seemed like a stupid thing, but after realizing he wasn't in love her and that he'll never be, everything seemed to trigger an argument between them.

Elliot felt bad for his brother, he knew he was trying, what he didn't say in front of Kate was that Christian said he was going to look for Ana, and he thought he was doing the right thing by not tormenting his brother with that name again.

* * *

'I had tried to love her,' he said to Ros and Elliot, 'I had really tried. But I just can't, and all I can think of is Ana, I can't get her out of my head, is like I'm getting crazy. And now…' he shot his whiskey '...Jessica is pregnant and I'm tight to her forever…' he said, crying for the first time in front of his brother and friend.

* * *

'Why did you do this to him?! And don't you dare telling me it was an accident. You knew, didn't you? You knew he was going to divorce you.' Said Kate to Jessica on the phone.

'Kate, what happens between him and I is only our business.'

'I told you not to do it, you are never going to be happy with him, not even now, he's just too good to say it himself. I know you did this on purpose, did he knew you stopped taking the pill…?'

Silence…

'I can't believe this! Please, don't even think you can count on me about this, because what you did is wrong. Let me ask you something. Is it even his?'

'I can't believe you are asking me this.'

'Is a simple question Jessica, you once said you'll do anything it takes to keep him with you and we both know why.'

'I thought you were my friend,' said Jessica

'I thought you were a good person, but you seem to be the worst now.' She said hanging up. She should had warned Christian...


	12. Confessions

I know some of you must be hating me, but without further ado here it is a new chapter.

Several of the characters belong to **E L James**

* * *

Ana was having a cup of tea while she was comfortable seated on an armchair of her living room, unconsciously caressing the brown leather. The TV, on top of the fireplace, was on. A random romantic comedy movie was playing, though she wasn't really paying attention to it. She was instead deep in thoughts about the last incidents.

No long ago she had gotten off the phone with Kate, they were meeting that night at Kate's place and they had planned to go out for dinner and maybe have some drinks. It was only four in the afternoon, she still had time to get ready. The memory of almost kissing Christian that morning made her feel warm. She knew that kissing him would have been a game changer for her relationship with John, it would have meant that she was officially cheating at him and once again she felt guilty. She needed to think of a way of ending things up with her husband.

Half an hour later she was surprised to hear the elevator bell, and just a second later the steps of John were heard on the foyer. "Are you home?" Asked John raising his voice and getting into the aisle that connected the entrance with the living room. He was obviously earlier than expected.

"I'm in the living room" she replied.

John walked towards her while losing the tie from his neck and un bottoming his shirt, he left his briefcase at the side of the sofa and leaned over to give Ana a kiss, then he sat down on the couch next to her seat and laid his head back closing his eyes. He looked very tired.

'You are early, are you ok?" she asked concerned while leaving the tea cup on the coffee table. Her husband wasn't looking so good.

John sighed. "I rescheduled some things... It's been... a hard day."

"Is it everything alright at work? Do you want to talk about it?"

He straightened his head and looked at Ana, his expression was as if he was lost in a crowded place. "I… don't know where to start," he said while his eyes were fixed on hers.

Ana felt nervous. Did he know something? She kept quiet, listening to what else he had to say.

"It is harder than I thought" he relaxed his body while letting out the words. "I mean, I just wanted to fit it, you know…" he said shrugging. "I thought I was doing things right, I'm passionate about what I'm doing, but then… you saw what happened this morning, and… You know, when you look up to someone getting a bad criticism from said person… I was so embarrassed, I felt like an asshole, I never wanted to sound like that nor to be disrespectful. I am aware I can be a little hard to swallow sometimes, but somehow I feel like I deserve respect myself… I kind of got lost in the way of making people know I am capable even though I don't have the same background as everybody else here" he sighed.

Ana was still silent, she was puzzled between giving him comfort or not. She didn't want to give him the wrong idea.

"I guess…" continued John "I'll change my way of doing things… at work and in life. You know…" he then leaned to her and grabbed her hands tenderly "...at least I know you are by my side, I'd be lost without you. You keep me grounded, you are exactly what I need right now."

Ana tried to smile the best she could, her heart was racing up, those weren't the words she wanted to hear from the person she wanted to break up with. She knew ending things with John wasn't and easy task, but the fact of him saying so clearly how he needed her was not a good thing.

And he continued,"I know things have been very different since we moved, I have changed, I have been selfish, I promise you I will give you more time" he kissed her knuckles and pressed her hands to his cheek and left them resting there for a few seconds.

Ana swallowed before speaking, and when she did, her voice was deeper than usual. "You don't…" she wasn't sure how to proceed "...have to worry about me, I know you are under pressure and I want you to be successful."

"I do worry, though" John insisted. "Since we are in Seattle we have been so distant to each other, don't you think?"

"John…" How could she say that she was okay with that. How could she break his heart in a moment of such vulnerability for him. How could she tell him that his job had nothing to do with her feelings for him. How could she confess she never loved him. "...I think you are right" she finally said, that wasn't the moment to open her heart to him. She would have to think about that later, with Christian.

He leaned more to kiss her, after a short contact Ana pull him back. Once again she didn't want to give him the wrong idea. "I have to go out tonight" she said letting go of his hand. "I am meeting Kate, my old friend from college, remember?" She told him the calmer she was able to "… I could always stay if you want me to, though."

"I think I can use the time to read a few reports and I'll have an early sleep, you go and have fun" John replied. He thought it was great for her to have someone there and now that he has spoken to Ana he was feeling so much better about everything.

Ana rushed to their bedroom and left John behind. Would she have to pretend with him that everything was fine while secretly loving Christian? John felt so broken right now, she couldn't even think what he would do if she dropped the bomb to him. They would have to wait.

* * *

Ana and Kate were making their way up to The Nest, the best bar in Seattle according to the second one. "You're going to love the view. It's unbelievable" said Kate, and once they got to the terrace Ana could say the same. You could see all Seattle's waterfront from it.

"Wow" she said really impressed, the sun was setting and made the view even more impressive.

"I told you" replied Kate smiling knowing she was right. They got two seats and ordered their drinks.

Kate insisted on going there after dinner. It was a good feeling talking to an old friend. After some chat about college memories and good laughs and a few drinks later they got more confident with each other so they started to share more personal things.

"I think you told me you haven't been married for too long?" Kate asked Ana after taking a sip of her third margarita.

"Three months in two days" she replied, the sad expression on her face didn't go unnoticed by Kate.

"Is it everything alright between you two?" asked the blonde one calmed, not wanting to pressure Ana, "you don't seem too happy about it."

"It is complicated…" said Ana shaking her head. "What about you?" asked Ana unable to give her a better answer.

"We have been married for 4 years, but we met long ago, we went out for two years before getting married." The way she said made Ana feel jealous.

"It sounds like a lot" said Ana, thinking she didn't feel like making it that long with John.

"It actually doesn't feel like that. We have so much fun together that it doesn't seem like that at all." Ana thought her three months felt like 30 years of an incomplete relationship, and probably Kate saw the sad shadow in her eyes.

"Are you ok, Ana?"

Ana was thinking if she could trust Kate.

"Was it hard… the first months I mean?" Ana was trying to avoid the eye contact.

"Mmm… we had our bad days, but in the end what mattered is that we loved each other. After all the time we have been together I feel like I couldn't live without him" she had a wide smile while saying it.

"Has it been that hard for you?" said Kate guessing Ana was having a bad day on her marriage.

"Sometimes…" she replied. "It's complicated."

"Well, you guys are just starting, there's a lot to put up with the first months" she said trying to be supportive.

"It's more complicated than that" replied Ana, she needed to trust someone, she needed to somehow, get a second opinion.

"What is it Ana? You can trust me, maybe I can help you" said Kate worried.

"I don't love him" she finally said. Kate looked shocked, she had heard those words before. "I care about him, and John is really nice to me and I thought I eventually would fall for him. I didn't want to end up alone… and I met this old boyfriend and all the feelings are back…" Ana drank the rest of her cocktail in one shot.

Kate didn't know what to say, she wanted to be supportive, and at the same time she was thinking about Ana's husband and put herself in his shoes too. "Are you... having an affair?" she said lowering her voice, the curiosity won her.

"Is so much more than that…" both girls were now whispering.

"Are you getting a divorce?"

'Eventually…" she said shrugging. "It's bad timing. Just before coming here he said he couldn't live without me.'

"Ana, I'm so sorry to hear that. But isn't it better to ends things quick?" Kate knew what could happen when people continued in relationships without love, her brother-in-law was the perfect example.

"I know, believe me, this is not the path I wanted to take, but I know him. He just got promoted and has a lot of responsibilities. He takes his job very seriously, if I do it now he would be completely devastated and he could lose what he has worked so hard to get. I'm going to end our marriage, at least I gotta try to give him time to adapt."

"Don't get me wrong Ana, I understand you and I'm your friend, but I wouldn't like to be in his shoes." It was like hearing Christian's story once again, because he waited so long to make a decision that things worked out even worse.

"I don't wanna hurt him more than what I know I will…" they were quiet for a few minutes. Ana felt bad, on her need of sharing she felt like their reunion was over, was Kate judging her? Maybe it was too soon to drop the bomb. "I'm sorry, maybe it wasn't appropriate to say this bomb today."

"No, don't worry. This doesn't change things between us, we are friends and let me know if you need my help."

"Thank you" she replied sincerely. "So please, let's change the subject."

Kate went on talking about her job with Christian and as a journalist and how she got to meet Elliot. She told her they were trying to have a baby. Ana appreciated that Kate was a good talker. Later that night they hugged and said their goodbyes with the promise of having more nights like that. Ana arrived to Escala and she was happy to learn that John was sleeping. She felt better now that she had shared a little bit of what was going on, she could only hope for the best.

She would have to talk to Christian, she didn't thought he was going to take the news of having to wait so well.


End file.
